Today, I've not done much. By most accounts today, I've been lazy. I sat in my living room for a few hours with a 17 year boy talking girls. I went downtown and paid the internet bill and rent. And, I've spent the rest of the afternoon in bed, while our maid cleaned and Ashley homeschooled the kids. Oh the life. No job to go clock into. No phone calls from a boss wondering when I'm coming in. In fact, as I type this, I'm eating a twizzler and drinking a glass of water, occasionally glancing out the window at the banana tree and rose bushes admiring the beautiful day. Man, I am a selfish lazy impostor. I really am. But, I did leave out some other information, I'm ashamed to say. I wasn't going to tell you, but maybe I should.
The boy I sat and chatted with came to talk to me about his fears of being a 17 year old dad. You see, he just found out that his 23 year old teacher is likely pregnant with his baby. This boy has 2 years of high school left and comes from an extremely poor family with 7 siblings in his home (18 total). He doesn't know how to be a dad, but doesn't want to repeat the cycle that he was raised in. His dad is a drunk and his mom has emotionally retreated so far, that she has no relationship with her kids. So, while there is a mother and father in the home, they do not know what it's like to have loving parents setting limits and giving advice and loving them. Where did he go when he found out his world may be about to turn up-side-down? The gringo he met 2 weeks ago and has only talked to twice. As we talked and he began to realize just how difficult life could be about to get, I asked him, "Who will you go to when you need advice? Who will be your support? Who will you cry with and who will show you love when you're doing everything you can to show love to this child and his mother?" The tearful reply was, "I have no one." I asked again, "Not a single person?" He turned and looked at me and with a solemn finger he pointed at me. "I wish I could live here and that you were my dad." I proceeded to share with him the gospel and how much we need Christ. I talked to him about how Christ doesn't make our lives easier, but he makes them bearable, he satisfies us when we are in great need and give us joy when we endure the trials of this life, he brings us peace when we are in the storm and he supplies us strength to overcome the obstacles we face.
I'd love to tell you he fell apart and accepted Christ right then. I'd love to say that he made a commitment or "said the sinner's prayer." But the response I got was a tearful nod, a contemplative expression and a deep, strong hug. I don't know what life has in store for this boy. I don't know where his heart stands or what his choices will be in the future, but I do know that he will be a part of my every prayer and I will stand with him. I will love him, when all others chose not to. I will carry him, when others have rejected him. I will share the hope of Christ, when others have judged him. Had we not come to Bolivia, God surely could have provided someone else to comfort this boy. But, I'm selfish. I see Christ in the least, and in my love for Christ, I want to be the first on scene. I want to be the one to see him come to hope and renewal in Christ. Selfish me.
He decided to run errands with me, so as we paid some bills (take a number, wait in line, pay, wait for receipt, occasionally have your id copied - two bills=two hours), I talked to him about the responsibilities of being an adult, paying bills, providing for a family, spending time with your kids, things many of the boys here are not taught because of a culture that perpetuates drunkenness and hopelessness. I have internet and live in a nice house. I'm living the high life. So selfish. Almost too selfish to enjoy using this blessing to teach this boy something about the practical things of life.
After he left, I spoke with our maid about life and general, with tears in her eyes she told how it was such blessing to her to see us invest in these boys. She, having come from an abusive home, living on the streets as a teen, and now being a single mother, knows the importance of someone investing in your life. She cried as she told me that life without Christ was too hard. Not that he made life easier, but that he gave her the strength she needs to endure a life that is hard. She conveyed how she doesn't have much, but loves to give and how God always supplies her needs. How she is thankful for the opportunity to work with us and how the steady income helps her take care of her son. You may still see me as selfish, but I see the few dollars a day as an investment in a life and can potentially reach thousands more here in Bolivia. You see, she isn't a mature believer, but only fairly recently came to know Christ. She still needs people to invest in her, challenge her, and love her.
After our conversation, I've been laying in bed resting. Be jealous. We'll just forget the fact that I'm resting because my little outing wore me out and I'm battling a parasite or ameba. I've spent the large majority of the weekend in the bathroom, or in a fetal position from the pain in my abdomen that comes and go without warning. Something all of the missionaries here deal with. Parasites and illness come with the territory. We live in a poor country, we serve poor people. We hug them, love them, and dine with them. Sickness is a part of that. But, "this light and momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory."
When Ashley and I made the decision to follow the Lord's leading to move to Bolivia, we were met with great resistance. Some people questioned whether God had really called us. Some family asked us why we were being selfish and taking our kids away from them. We faced the choice where we decided, "it is better to follow God rather than man." We prayed and followed the leading of the Holy Spirit, regardless of how difficult it made our relationships, and inspite of the strain it placed on our family. "Obedience is better than sacrifice."
Last week, while celebrating Thanksgiving, we spent time with many of the missionaries here. When the topics of conversation turned to family or friends back home, an occasional theme is the label of "selfish" that is applied to missionaries, from people who don't understand the culture or our methods. We don't have a maid because we can't clean our own house. We have one, because if we didn't the culture would say we were stingy. Stingy missionaries don't make good missionaries. We also decided that we could make a difference in her life (and the life of her son). It's not a luxury for us. It's an investment (in line with Bolivian culture), with spiritual returns. We didn't come to Bolivia, give up holidays with family, forfeit seeing nieces and nephews grow up, sacrifice hot showers and good healthcare, or do without the things you take for granted (like cream of chicken and affordable cheddar cheese) because we are selfish. We came to Bolivia to be obedient to Christ, to share the hope of our savior with a hopeless people, to minister to the helpless, and to take part in Christ's mission to "seek and save the lost."
With that said, I have a request and a challenge. Your request is to love your missionaries. Support them. Pray for them. Give them grace when you don't understand their methods or their choices. Realize that though there are bad missionaries, there are also bad Christians (and yes, selfishness is a common culprit). We all need grace and we need each other. Find out how you can minister to the missionaries you support through prayer, finances, encouragement, etc. Now, here's your challenge: How are you taking part in Christ's mission to "seek and save the lost" where you live? We are all missionaries, no matter if it's where we grew up or the weird country we moved off to. We have an obligation under the grace we've been given in Christ to love him with our obedience to his mission. Your challenge is to look for ways to affect your community for Christ.
Grace and peace,
Seth
